Soulmate Gem
Photo by Cory de Vega Pexels Logo Photo: Cory de Vega

Why shouldn't you look a dog in the eyes?

In their wolf ancestors, staring is considered threatening and rude. Some dogs still retain that attitude. That's why you should never stare down strange dogs or hold dogs still to stare into their eyes. If a dog gives you a hard stare, with unblinking eyes and a stiff posture, back away and don't make eye contact.

How do I know if he loves me without asking him?
How do I know if he loves me without asking him?

He'll do anything for you without thinking about it twice. Even if he's tired or doesn't have the time, whenever you need him he'll be there in a...

Read More »
What are the 4 stages of intimacy?
What are the 4 stages of intimacy?

Intimacy refers to a level of closeness where you feel validated and safe. In relationships, four types of intimacy are key: emotional, physical,...

Read More »

Dogs have several reasons for staring at their owners, like to communicate with and understand us. Some dogs stare to manipulate owners, as in with begging for food or asking to be let outside. Training and dog sports are good ways to turn focused staring behavior into a positive experience. Have you ever felt your dog’s eyes following you, like they’re watching your every move? Maybe your dog stares at you while enjoying a chew toy or bone. Or, perhaps you enjoy sitting with your dog and gazing into each other’s eyes. Whatever the scenario, dogs spend a great deal of time staring at humans. And many dog owners spend a great deal of time wondering why. Unfortunately, there is no simple one-stare-fits-all answer. Dogs have many reasons for turning their gaze on us. But most of the time they are either communicating with us or waiting for us to communicate with them. With a little knowledge and observation, you can learn to tell the difference. You can also teach your dog alternative ways to communicate that aren’t quite so puzzling as staring. More than almost any other animal on earth, dogs are in tune with humans. They sense our moods, follow our pointing gestures, and read us for information about what’s going to happen next. That means they stare at us a lot to gain knowledge about their environment. Essentially, they are waiting for us to do something that will impact them. For example, dogs quickly learn that their owners pick up the leash before taking them on a walk. Therefore, they will watch for that signal that a trip outside is on its way. The same is true for mealtimes, play sessions, car rides, and so much more. Dogs also wait for more deliberate cues from their owners. Cues to perform a specific behavior like sit or down are chances to earn a reward. Since dogs love getting a treat, toy, or game, they will keep an eye out for these opportunities. This is particularly true of dogs trained with positive reinforcement methods. These dogs learn to love training and wait eagerly for signs it’s time to play the training game.

Dogs Are Trying to Tell Us Something

Staring also occurs when your dog is trying to get your attention or tell you something. For example, if it’s time for a potty break, your dog might sit by the door and gawk at you. Or, if your dog is hungry and you’re eating, staring can indicate a desire for you to share your food. It’s the canine equivalent of a tap on the shoulder.

Do twin flames always meet?
Do twin flames always meet?

Twin flames are meant to reunite with one another, but that doesn't always mean that they do. Sometimes twin flames don't recognize each other...

Read More »
How do you tell a guy he is moving too fast?
How do you tell a guy he is moving too fast?

Use “I” statements Instead of saying things like, “You're moving too fast,” or “You're talking about the future too much,” try to avoid pointing...

Read More »

Some dogs stare to manipulate their owners and get something they want. This is a common scenario with begging at the dinner table. If the dog stares long enough, the owner will hand over a morsel of their meal. In truth, you have created that monster. In the beginning, the dog would have stared simply out of interest. If you ignored the gaze, your pup probably would have found something else to do. But the stare makes you feel uncomfortable or guilty, so you give in to make it stop. And there you have it- the dog has learned a new way to communicate. If you become aware of your reaction to your dog’s staring behavior and eliminate any rewards, your dog will eventually try new behaviors to get your attention. A better approach is to teach your dog what you would like instead. For example, your dog could chew a bone in a dog bed while you eat, or ring a doggie bell to let you know it’s time for an outdoor potty break. If you reward the new behavior and ignore the staring, soon you will have a dog that looks at you for cues rather than guilt trips.

Dogs Are Telling Us How They Feel

Your pup also uses eye contact to express emotions, both positive and negative. In their wolf ancestors, staring is considered threatening and rude. Some dogs still retain that attitude. That’s why you should never stare down strange dogs or hold dogs still to stare into their eyes. If a dog gives you a hard stare, with unblinking eyes and a stiff posture, back away and don’t make eye contact. You might see this in your own dog when there is a bone or other valued treat at stake. Resource guarding is often accompanied by a hard stare and other aggressive body language. If you see it in your dog, consult a professional trainer or behaviorist. Of course, a lot of dog staring is exactly what it seems — an expression of love. Just as humans stare into the eyes of someone they adore, dogs will stare at their owners to express affection. In fact, mutual staring between humans and dogs releases oxytocin, known as the love hormone. This chemical plays an important role in bonding and boosts feelings of love and trust. The same hormone that is released when a new mother looks at her baby is also triggered when you look at your dog. No wonder our dogs like to stare at us all the time.

Why do I crave a hug?
Why do I crave a hug?

“When we hug someone, that physical contact releases a hormone in the body called oxytocin,” she told the ABC. “Oxytocin makes us feel warm and...

Read More »
How do you know if you have a spark with someone?
How do you know if you have a spark with someone?

We naturally feel comfortable with each other. A "spark" can also take the form of a sinking feeling, goosebumps, or butterflies in your stomach...

Read More »

Dogs and Humans Can Benefit from Staring

Most dog staring is a combination of affection and attention. While it may make you uncomfortable, your dog is most likely fascinated by you. So rather than discouraging that human-centric focus, you can make it work for both of you. First, be aware of the signals you give your dog. For example, are you saying sit with your words but something completely different with your body language? Help your dog understand your intentions by being consistent and clear. Second, a focused dog is easier to train. If your dog is looking at you, the surrounding distractions are less likely to get in the way. Consider putting your dog’s eye contact on cue with a phrase like “look at me” or “watch me.” Then you can ask for some stares when you want your dog to pay attention to you rather than the environment. Finally, consider using that intense eye contact to give you a performance boost at dog sports. Sports like AKC Rally or Agility depend on teamwork. The dog must be in tune with the handler’s body position and cues at all times. And in sports like Obedience and AKC Trick Dog, dogs need to learn very specific and exact behaviors, then execute them without being distracted. Dogs that are attentively staring towards their humans will learn faster and perform better.

Do you ever stop loving your first love?
Do you ever stop loving your first love?

“Only you can make the decision to stay here and move into your future, rather than regressing into your past.” While you may not be able to forget...

Read More »
How does a man in love look at you?
How does a man in love look at you?

If a man is in love with you, he tends to hold eye contact or stare at you for longer. Since eye contact between two people who are in love can be...

Read More »
What is a soul friend?
What is a soul friend?

So anam cara in the Celtic world was the “soul friend.” In the early Celtic church, a person who acted as a teacher, companion, or spiritual guide...

Read More »
How do I stop fantasizing about someone?
How do I stop fantasizing about someone?

Find a positive distraction Pick up a book. Put on some music. Watch a favorite movie. Talk to a friend. Head out for a walk or jog.

Read More »