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Why does PDA give me anxiety?

One of the main traits of PDA is described as an anxiety-based need to avoid demands. There is some research to suggest that underneath the anxiety is an 'intolerance of uncertainty' and a need for control. Whatever the mechanism, the fact that anxiety and demand avoidance tend to go hand in hand isn't in doubt.

pdasociety.org.uk - Anxiety of the PDA Kind

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Anxiety of the PDA kind

It’s a wierd thing that when I was young everyone thought I was hugely confident and out-going – now I find I’m a ball of anxiety, but I still don’t show it that much One of the main traits of PDA is described as an anxiety-based need to avoid demands. There is some research to suggest that underneath the anxiety is an ‘intolerance of uncertainty’ and a need for control. Whatever the mechanism, the fact that anxiety and demand avoidance tend to go hand in hand isn’t in doubt. But it’s also true that the anxiety doesn’t necessarily look like the anxiety that people are used to seeing. Anxiety of the PDA kind is less likely to cause someone to look nervous and to be withdrawn – especially in younger years. We may be more likely to chat away (distracting people or putting off doing things!) or if things have got really hard, it may be that shouting or violence sometimes takes over. For some, this changes over the years.

This is how anxiety looks and feels from our perspective….

Julia: If I’m looking externally anxious it’s too late – you’ve already missed loads. If I’ve managed to shower, get dressed, prepare a meal and do a household chore then that’s a good day, if I’m just playing Candy Crush and watching TV it’s a big warning sign that I’m not coping. So it’s about being attuned to what I’m doing or not doing. I fidget a lot when I’m anxious and I chew the skin on the side of my thumb. I sway rather than standing still because I find that comforting. If I say ‘I’m going out for a cigarette’ it’s best to let me, it’s my way of showing that I’m coping-ish but it’s not great. The more anxious I get the more cognitively impaired I feel, I get muddled and forget what I’m saying. The gap between trigger and meltdown when I was a child was very small. As an adult it’s longer, which I put down to a mixture of maturity and self-awareness, having greater control over my own life and knowing what strategies help. Riko: I never used to think I felt anxiety, until I learnt what it actually was, I have alexithymia (inability to distinguish emotions) so that’s not a surprise. I still think I’m the least anxious person despite having two conditions which cause serious anxiety. I think anxiety is merely a symptom of demand avoidance, and that anxiety causes us to try to control our environment to reduce the emotion. For me, anxiety just makes me feel sick, it’s a baseline emotion for me because I experience it so often. When my anxiety gets bad I get a panicky adrenaline rush and I feel I have to act, that makes me look controlling because at that moment I NEED everyone to do as I say. Thankfully this rarely happens. Tony: When it comes to how we display anxiety, I agree that it is often not as one imagines when one thinks of a traditional panic attack. For me, when I reach my boiling point, my reaction is often intricately entwined with my PTSD and almost always displays as a PTSD-style reaction at first. Once my amygdala calms down though the observable anxiety is almost entirely reduced, except from a nervous tick/twitch I have developed with age but again that may just be me.

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Is ODD like ADHD?

What Are the Differences? The key difference is that with ADHD, your child usually has trouble paying attention and they're hyperactive. With ODD, your child is defiant, cranky, and angry. ADHD symptoms tend to show up when your child is 12 or younger.

webmd.com - ADHD vs. ODD: Similarities and Differences - WebMD

If your child has attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), it’s not unusual for them to have other conditions at the same time. These are called comorbidities. Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) is one such condition. In fact, ODD is the most common comorbidity with ADHD. Experts believe that about four out of 10 kids with ADHD also have ODD. Here’s a look at what happens when your child has ADHD and ODD at the same time.

Hyperactivity

Impulsive behavior ODD is a type of behavior disorder that’s mostly diagnosed in childhood. If your child has ODD, they tend to be: Uncooperative

Defiant

Aggressive The two conditions may appear similar because some of the symptoms can overlap. But the causes are usually different. For example, ADHD is mostly a genetic condition and is often passed down from family members. Kids with ADHD find it difficult to control their behavior. In contrast, ODD is often a learned behavior or stems from developmental issues. If your child loses their temper quickly, argues too much, destroys property, or purposely annoys others, it’s often a sign of a more serious condition linked with antisocial behavior.

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