What to do when you miss someone you shouldn't be missing?

betterhelp.com - 7 Tips About How To Stop Missing Someone | BetterHelp | Loneliness

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"I miss you." These three words are simple yet poignant. There are many reasons to long for someone who is gone, either physically or emotionally from your life. If you find yourself missing someone, know that this is a completely natural feeling. Here are a few tips to help you cope.

Why Are You Missing Someone?

There are many reasons why you may be missing someone you love and you may be wondering how to forget someone you love. Maybe the relationship ended, and you felt like you didn’t have the right closure. Or perhaps you are still in a relationship that’s heading towards the end, and you are already missing and mourning the emotional loss of your partnership. These are all plausible reasons why you might be feeling nostalgic and missing someone in your life right now. Tools like confiding in close friends, journaling, talking to a therapist, or meditating can all help you process, cope with, and move past the pain of missing someone.

"Nostalgia Is A Powerful Drug" - Kate Christensen

If you're reading this and missing a certain someone, understand that nostalgia is a powerful emotion. When we remember someone we've lost, it's natural to focus on the good times and forget the negative ones. You may want to recall happy memories when you remember someone important to you, whether that was an ex-lover, a former spouse, or anything in between. What does that mean? It indicates that we are likely to keep missing our loved ones when we're nostalgic for them. It's important to remember the good with the bad. It may not have always been great. One of the ways to cope with longing for someone who is gone is to stop idealizing them. And if you find yourself stuck in a nostalgic rut and continue to miss someone, try adopting a more balanced perspective in life. Breakups can cause you to miss a loved one. You may have spent a lot of time with your partner, and now they're gone. In the United States, about 35% of marriages end in divorce. According to that statistic, it's relatively common to separate from a long-term partner. There will likely be a loss there. If you don't have children, you may not see that person again or remain friends, and this can be a terrible feeling. But you can get through missing them. Many people have emerged from breakups as happier and more fulfilled individuals. A great way to work through that pain is by talking to a close friend, family, or a therapist, whether that's online or in your local area.

How To Stop The Pain Of Missing Someone: Mind Over Matter

Unfortunately, there is no magic pill or wand to wave away the pain when you miss someone. But there are things you can do in your daily life to help cope with, manage, and reconcile the pain you're feeling. Below are seven tips to help you get through the pain.

Do Not Expect The Pain Of Missing Someone To Go Away Overnight

There is often an adjustment period when a person you care about is gone. The feelings you have after a breakup are complex behavioral, biochemical, and physiological phenomena. In other words, it is not all in your head and it’s completely normal. You cannot expect to stop thinking about them and quit feeling bad overnight just because you want to. Even if it was your decision to cut it off, there will still be times you will miss and think about this someone and it can cause you negative emotions every once in a while that become an obstacle in your path to going forward in your life. First, it may be 50 times a day. Then after a few weeks, you may notice that you are only thinking about the person 10 times a day. Eventually, you will likely realize that you do not miss them as much anymore. Learning to cope with missing someone may take a few weeks to a few months, depending on the relationship and how you deal with it. It’s hard to know what your heart is going to do, and it can be very hard to control it. Just ride it out and accept what happens next.

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Accept The Pain Of Loneliness And Missing Someone

When you miss someone dearly, there are going to be days when all you want to do is lie on the bed and cry. That is fine, and normal, but try to avoid letting it go on for too long. Accepting the pain can help you to get rid of it. For example, talking about it with a friend or even a counselor may help you understand your feelings better. Suppressing your feelings can cause them to show up again later or manifest in a different way and affect your mental health and possibly future relationships. Acknowledging your feelings and working through them can help you move forward. Embrace The Good Things And Find Hope For Love With Somebody In The Future Try to think about the good things that will come out of your situation. For example, maybe now you can go out with your friends more, binge watch that new show you have been wanting to see, or maybe catch up on your reading or start spending time enjoying other new and old hobbies. Remember why you are in this situation. If it was a breakup, then there were likely some issues in the relationship, and the decision to end things with that person was probably a smart, healthy choice for your future. You are allowed to miss them, but remind yourself that it was probably for the best.

Get Rid Of The Reminders Of Pain And Loneliness

You will likely have mementos of your special someone that you see every day. If you miss someone, consider restricting your to those things that could remind you of them. It might also be time to delete their number—and photos of them—from your phone. You can also mute or remove them from your social media accounts. You don’t have to get rid of everything that reminds you of them, but just enough that allows you to keep moving forward and making progress. Consider hiding things somewhere you cannot see them so you will not have those reminders everywhere that can trigger a bad feeling on an otherwise good day. Most people will benefit from an out-of-sight-out-of-mind approach when trying to move on from old relationships

Keep Your Mind Busy

If you miss someone, you should find positive distractions that will help take your mind off of things. Join a club, find a new hobby, enjoy an old one, or spend more time with family and friends - these are all excellent coping strategies. One good thing to do is to join a gym or exercise group. There is plenty of research and peer reviewed studies that show that the physical effects of exercise boost your endorphins, which can make you feel better. You may even meet someone new, too, and that’s a great feeling as well!

See This As A Reason To Be Social

It’s okay to spend some time grieving on your own when you miss someone, but try to put yourself in social situations when the time is right. Get out and talk to your friends and family. Go to the grocery store, mall, wherever. Just get out there and spend time with other people and enjoy life in the moment and appreciate the positive things out there with them and form brand new memories that make you feel good.

Move Into The Future With Hope

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Eventually, you will realize that you are thinking of them less and less and it’s become easier to deal with the separation. You may even find someone else whom you care about. Some people feel wrong or guilty thinking that it is too soon or that they should not get into another relationship with a new person. Remember that you deserve to move on and live your life on your terms. And if you are having feelings for someone, then it may be the time. There is no magic time limit on when you can decide to start forming new relationships and new memories, and you will get through this. Therapy Can Help You Focus Your Mind Away From the Person You Miss And On To The Present It's natural to reminisce about the ones we've lost, as well as cry over them, especially if they were a special person in our lives. But when you work with a licensed therapist, you can talk about your fond memories of your loved one and learn how to cope with missing someone. You can discuss the sadness or grief you feel that they're not around anymore. The therapists at BetterHelp understand how hard it is to move forward and get out of your comfort zone when you're coping with a loss or when you're trying to heal from a breakup that’s causing you mental health issues. You might be in the process of getting divorced and trying to figure out how to heal from that separation. Understandably, when you miss another person, there may be pain involved here because of the positive memories from the past. If you’re feeling stuck, a therapist can help you get through this challenging time, learn to process your feelings and cope with missing your loved one, and appreciate what's in your present. You can value the time you had with the person you're missing and learn to enjoy your life now and keep moving forward. Read below for some reviews of BetterHelp counselors.

Counselor Reviews

"Jennifer is amazing. I feel like I hit the jackpot with her. She has helped me tremendously through this very difficult time in my life. She provides perspective and insight that is hard to see when you're in the middle of things. She is easy to talk to, not judgmental, and very knowledgeable. I highly recommend her." "I have been working with Danny Drew as my counselor for several months now. He is very accurate in the direction of the counseling session. He is very kind, calm, and listens very well. He is very coherent with all the work we have done. I trust his guidance. He is very respectful of my ideas and beliefs. He knows how to hold the space very well. He is a great counselor."

betterhelp.com - 7 Tips About How To Stop Missing Someone | BetterHelp | Loneliness

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