Soulmate Gem
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What is the probability of finding your soulmate?

one in 10,000 Given half a billion potential soul mates, your chance of finding your true love is one in 10,000. Monroe speculates on the consequences of such a world where a vast majority will remain alone.

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When Eric Goulden was a young man, his mother said to him, “There is only one girl in the world for you, and she probably lives in Tahiti.” She paused, and then added, “Or maybe she’s in the Bahamas, where the Caribbean Sea is blue.” Eric resolved to travel the whole wide world to find this woman. Eric, better known as rock singer Wreckless Eric, once penned a song that outlined perfectly the problem of the soul mate theory: that is, that each of us only has one person in the world meant for them. “The Whole Wide World,” later covered by Will Ferrell in the film Stranger Than Fiction as well as a host of bands such as The Proclaimers and The Monkees, describes the desperate measure a young man will go to find his one girl.

But if we all only have one single random soul mate, what are the chances we would ever meeting that person?

This is one of the many absurd hypothetical questions that plague Randall Munroe. A former NASA roboticist, Munroe now draws the geek cult webcomic “xkcd,” described by The Economist as “an eclectic mixture of science, maths and whimsy served three times a week.” Since, what if?, a subsection of the site, has encouraged readers to throw questions to Munroe, which he attempts to answer to the best of science’s ability. A what if? book based on his answers was released last September. Apart from examining machine-gun jetpacks, orbital submarines, the effects of everyone jumping at once and the Force power of Yoda, Munroe also examined the question of soul mates.

SO, WHAT ARE THE ODDS?

After confining himself to only examining living people and making assumptions about inappropriate age gaps, he concludes that most people have a pool of around half a billion potential matches. This is if you don’t restrict for gender and sexual orientation, as well culture and language differences.

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Can grief damage your heart?

The heartbreak of grief can increase blood pressure and the risk of blood clots. Intense grief can alter the heart muscle so much that it causes "broken heart syndrome," a form of heart disease with the same symptoms as a heart attack.

What Can You Do to Cope With Grief?

Emotional and physical self-care are essential ways to ease complications of grief and boost recovery. Exercising, spending time in nature, getting enough sleep, and talking to loved ones can help with physical and mental health. "Most often, normal grief does not require professional intervention," says Zisook. "Grief is a natural, instinctive response to loss, adaptation occurs naturally, and healing is the natural outcome," especially with "time and the support of loved ones and friends." Grief researchers emphasize that social support, self-acceptance, and good self-care usually help people get through normal grief. (Shear encourages people to "plan small rewarding activities and try to enjoy them as much as possible.") But the researchers say people need professional help to heal from complicated grief and depression. Davis says therapy and physical activities like going for walks helped her cope. Social support helped most when friends tried to reach out instead of waiting or asking her to reach out to them. "Th thing about grief and depression and sorrow and being suicidal is that you can't reach out. For many people going through a hard time, reaching out is impossible. If your friend is in grief, reach out to them. Do the legwork. They’re too exhausted!" Davis' advice to most people who are grieving is to "Lean into it. You only get to grieve your loved one once. Don't spend the whole time trying to distract yourself or push it down. It does go away eventually, and you will miss feeling that connected to that person again. And if you feel like your whole life has fallen apart, that's fine! It totally has. Now you get to decide how to put yourself back together. Be creative. There's new life to be lived all around you."

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