Photo: Pixabay

What is the attraction to a narcissist?

Our Self-Esteem Unfortunately, we accept the love we think we deserve. On the flip side, you may be attracted to narcissistic partners because of their confidence and charm. They can introduce you to their life of excitement and supposed glamour, making you feel amazing - but only when you're with them.

amylaunder.com - Why Am I Attracted to Narcissists? - Amy Launder Psychotherapy

Does grieving ever stop?

Everyone deals with a bereavement in their own way and this is the same when a partner dies. Take the time to grieve in your own way and don't be...

Last updated Aug 7, 2020

How to get her to chase you?

17 Ways To Make Her Chase You Make a unique first impression. Save. ... Mind your appearance when you are around her. ... Show her your mysterious...

Last updated Sep 1, 2020

Do you really know who the “One” is? Your true Soulmate?

Promotion

Anyone can find themselves n a relationship with a narcissist, especially a grandiose narcissist, who will be charming, charismatic, and manipulative. However, if you repeatedly find yourself in relationships with narcissists, it is likely that this isn’t a coincidence, and that there is something deeper at play here. There is something, probably subconsciously, that is driving you towards narcissistic partners, or that is pulling them towards you. It might be that you are being driven by repeating patterns from the past, or that you are meeting some need, however self-destructive that may be. So, today, we are going to look at what these driving factors might be, and how you can guard against falling for another narcissistic partner in the future. If you’d like to read more about the relationship patterns of narcissists, or signs that the person you’re dating might be a narcissist, click the links to read more and see if you recognise any of the signs. Before we go any further, it’s important to understand what Narcissism is. Narcissism is on a spectrum, and can actually be at healthy levels in some people. Healthy levels of narcissism are basically good self-esteem. It is when you believe in yourself and your skills, and your self-evaluation is realistic (i.e. you don’t think you are the absolute best at everything when you are actually a beginner). You are able to understand other people’s feelings and emotions, and can empathise with them. Criticism doesn’t devastate you or cause you to throw a tantrum. Essentially, your sense of self can withstand the ups and downs of other people’s opinions. Unhealthy, or malignant, narcissism is the other end of the spectrum. Someone who has malignant narcissism has a very fragile sense of self. They are overly self-involved and have a very inflated sense of their abilities, which hides a profound vulnerability and shame. Their sense of self is fuelled by praise and compliments and yet threatened by criticism and negative feedback. Honest feedback can trigger extreme anger. Anyone can have one or two narcissistic traits, but it doesn’t mean that they have Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

Reasons you’re attracted to narcissists… or they’re attracted to you!

How do I tell my crush that I like him?

How to tell your crush you like him: 7 ways to let him know about your feelings! Give him compliments: ... Subtle touch: ... Pick your choice of...

Last updated Feb 19, 2021

Which planet causes problems in marriage?

Saturn and Rahu play the primary dominant role whereas, Sun influences subtly by playing the secondary role. If Saturn is the lord of the seventh...

Last updated Oct 23, 2018

Promotion

Our Parents

Many of those who attract narcissistic partners as adults have experienced some form of narcissistic abuse in childhood. Either one or both narcissistic parent(s) teach us that the world, and people in it, are a certain way. We experience love and affection from our narcissistic parent(s) only when we act a certain way, and so we learn that we have to bend and mould to the other person in order to be loved. Our perception of ourselves and the world around us is based on what our parents showed us and taught us. If this sounds familiar, it is perfectly understandable that you would choose a partner who confirms these beliefs that you’ve grown up with. A partner who lets you do whatever you want or who doesn’t attempt to manipulate and control you might come across as uncaring or disinterested in the relationship.

2. Our Self-Esteem

It might sound counter-intuitive, but if you have low self-esteem, you might be attracted to partners who confirm your low self-esteem by putting you down. Unfortunately, we accept the love we think we deserve. On the flip side, you may be attracted to narcissistic partners because of their confidence and charm. They can introduce you to their life of excitement and supposed glamour, making you feel amazing - but only when you’re with them. If you have low self-esteem, narcissists can look as if they are coming to your rescue. The way that narcissistic relationships tend to start out is with “love-bombing”, which involves the narcissist throwing affection, attention, and care at you. they might take you for fancy dinners, say “I love you” quite quickly, ask you to move in with them, buy you gifts and flowers, and so on. Someone with low self-esteem might be overwhelmed by this outpouring of love and affection and will do anything to get more of it, even putting up with manipulative and unacceptable behaviour later down the line.

3. Co-dependent Tendencies

If you are a people pleaser, who likes others to need them, likes to be indispensable to others, you may find that you are attracted to narcissists and that they are attracted to you.

Is dating a 20 year old at 16?

No, it's not against the law for a 20 year old to "DATE" a 16 year old. The definition of 'date' means to go out together to a movie or to dinner...

Last updated Oct 28, 2022

What do girls first notice?

Your hair is one of the first things a woman notices about you. When a woman notices your hair, it's probably because you either have a great mane,...

Last updated Apr 20, 2019

Promotion

Someone with narcissistic tendencies will be able to identify others who will allow them to be dominant in the relationship. This means that if they see you as someone who will be overly accommodating to their needs, will allow them to be in control, they will be more attracted to you. If you are someone who will love and adore a partner no matter what, fulfilling their needs while mostly ignoring your own, then a narcissistic person will see you as the ideal partner.

4. Empathic

Someone who is highly empathic might be drawn to narcissists, and vice versa, as narcissists rely on being the sole focus of their partner’s attention. An empathic person will naturally appeal to a narcissistic person as they will know that the empathic partner will want to be there for them, will want to “rescue” them, and so on. If you read more about the relationship patterns of a narcissist, you will see that common phrases include “No one gets me like you do”, “no one else understands me”, and “I’ve never met anyone like you before”. This will likely feed the ego of the empathic partner, making them feel needed, wanted, and appreciated. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with being empathic and caring about others, but this is a quality that the narcissist will latch onto and manipulate to suit their needs.

5. Naivety

Someone who hasn’t grown up around, or spent much time with, manipulative people, will be less likely to see the signs of manipulation, and will therefore be more trusting of their partner. It might take them much longer to notice that the relationship isn’t healthy or that there is something wrong.

amylaunder.com - Why Am I Attracted to Narcissists? - Amy Launder Psychotherapy

What are the qualities of a soulmate?

Consider these seven qualities as essential to fostering an incredible, lifelong partnership: Generosity. The first quality to seek in a soulmate...

Last updated Feb 13, 2022

Why do people get married?

Among married and cohabiting adults, love is cited more than any other reason for why they decided to get married or to move in with their partner:...

Last updated Jul 17, 2018

Promotion

Can a 15 year old date a 13 year old?

No, it is generally not illegal to simply be in a non-sexual relationship with a minor. However, just because it is not illegal to date someone...

Last updated May 6, 2022

Promotion

What is the weakest part of the male body?

What are the weakest parts of a man? His nipples. Don't be surprised ladies, it's not just your nips that love the attention! ... The back of his...

Last updated Nov 5, 2020