What is soul seeking?

Soul searching—or the idea of nourishing your soul—is an important exercise every person can and should partake in. Simply put, it's the desire to look more deeply for meaning in your life, says Kelley Kitely, LCSW, a Chicago social worker and best-selling author of MY self: An Autobiography of Survival.

oprahdaily.com - Here's Exactly How to Start Your Soul Searching Journey - Oprah Daily

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Soul searching—or the idea of nourishing your soul—is an important exercise every person can and should partake in. Simply put, it’s the desire to look more deeply for meaning in your life, says Kelley Kitely, LCSW, a Chicago social worker and best-selling author of “Most people engage in soul searching (or should) when life seems out of sync, or when they're in a rut, experiencing negative feelings towards their careers or relationships" she explains. But if you don’t know where to start—or exactly what to do—try following these expert-recommended tips to nourish your soul and find that deeper meaning in your everyday existence.

Spend some time alone.

“Taking a moment to put yourself first is not selfish—it actually allows you to replenish and be present in the moment for others,” says LaQuista Erinna, LCSW, a New Jersey social worker.

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Try touring a local attraction, going for a stroll in the park, or sitting down with your journal to really give yourself some "me" time to recognize what you're missing.

Then, connect with new people.

“Strike up a conversation with someone in line at the grocery store, say hello to the cashier, or warmly smile at a stranger,” suggests Erinna. “While technology and social media have connected us to family, friends, and celebrities, we still crave that human connection. "Being kind or friendly to a stranger will make you feel good inside,” and help you get back in sync with yourself by seeing yourself reflected through someone else's yes.

But, disconnect with social media.

Equally important to the soul-nourishing equation is to spend time away from your besties—at least digitally speaking. “Be present in the here and now: ignore social media, log out of your apps, and turn off your notifications for at least an hour a day,” advises Dominic Gaziano, MD, a Chicago-based internist. We know you've heard this one before, but it can't be overstated how helpful this step can be.

Partake in a spiritual practice.

Keep in mind that the word "spiritual" is not necessarily equated with any kind of religious practice, but rather one that’s from within. Dr. Nancy Mramor, a Pittsburgh psychotherapist, recommends taking up meditation in your soul-searching journey. “It changes the brain, nervous system and mood,” she says. Try one of these expert-picked meditation apps to get started with just a few minutes of inwards reflection a day.

Try a new hobby.

Maybe meditation falls into this one, but it could be anything really—try your hand at painting, writing, or even just power walking. “Do what brings you joy—creative endeavors particularly encouraged,” says Dr. Mramor. “Any activity that puts you in the state of "flow," where you lose track of time and space and get lost in your bliss will nourish you.”

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Kitely agrees. “Trying out a new hobby helps us to get outside our comfort zone which awakens new skill and growth—creative outlets can ignite us even if we don’t necessarily think we’re good at the activity." For more ways to live your best life plus all things Oprah, sign up for our newsletter!

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Is it normal to not hear from your boyfriend all day?

Absolutely nothing is “normal.” Some couples text a million times a day, while others save it for pillow talk. Sometimes, on super busy workdays, there might be no communication at all. And that's totally fine.

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“I’m a big texter. I like to share my thoughts on news, vent about work and just have a little light banter. It helps me get through the day. But my long-term boyfriend is not a texter and literally goes hours without texting me back. He was a lot better early in our relationship, but it’s been a few years, and he’s no longer as communicative. It bothers me a lot, but I can’t tell what a reasonable amount of communication is. He insists what we had was too much. What’s the answer?” This is actually a very common problem in relationships. Why? Probably because our standards for communication are often set in the dating phase when things are new and exciting and you have a lot to learn about each other. For lots of folks, once you settle into a relationship, get into a routine and even move in together, there’s less urgency. When communication in a relationship evolves and our expectations don’t, there’s a dissonance, and to resolve it, we need to check in with ourselves and our partner. But before you get to that, here’s a general guideline for how communication tends to ebb and flow throughout a relationship. Read on, and try to point to where you might land.