Soulmate Gem
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What are the 3 loves?

The three loves that she came up with are the following: Lust, Passion, and Commitment. These three loves occur in different parts of the brain and occur independently from each other.

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Love Three: Commitment

If two people remain in passion for long enough, and there is a long-term compatibility where they can continue to share new life experiences together indefinitely, then commitment will arise. Commitment is an unbelievably powerful feeling and occurs rarely in life. Commitment is when the passion of Love Two persists to the point that it’s unconditional. Couples that are in Love Two and not Love Three will often feel great until something happens: he loses his job, she has a miscarriage, he starts drinking, etc. Commitment is when you emotionally accept and love the other person’s flaws as much as their strengths. Scientists have actually shown that for couples who reach that level of commitment, their senses of self actually merge with the other person.6 What researchers have done is observe neural activation patterns in these long-term couples. They found that if you ask a man married for 20 years to think about his wife getting into a car accident, and then ask him to think about himself getting into a car accident, the same “self” spots in his brain will light up, whereas it won’t for anybody else. And it won’t for couples who have not been at the Third Love of commitment for a long period of time. Commitment arises with the idea that the relationship will persist indefinitely. The only way it can end is if one or both parties of a relationship change individually to the point where it becomes harmful for the other person to self-identify with their partner: again, think of the husband who becomes an alcoholic, or the wife who keeps cheating, etc. Sometimes even then, the power of commitment holds on, depending on the individuals. Passion and Lust can disappear well after Commitment arises without affecting the Commitment. In this way, each love is a pre-requisite for the subsequent love to emerge, but once it has, it’s no longer necessary. Lust is needed for passion, but passion can exist later without it. Passion must exist for commitment, but later on, commitment can exist without it. There are timetables for each love, although these are very arbitrary and will vary widely from person to person and couple to couple. But it’s helpful to think about this: Lust is instantaneous and comes and goes constantly, being very easy to retrieve once lost. Passion takes anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to emerge, and usually sticks around for 3-6 months. In highly compatible couples, it will persevere but still require effort and constant communication to maintain beyond a couple years. Commitment arises after anywhere from 1-3 years together and remains for a lifetime unless two people grow apart as individuals, in which case it often takes years to undo itself. (Cover image: “Couples on Kuta” by Nor Sasono is licensed under CC BY 2.0)

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What is a good Bible verse for a relationship?

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." The Good News: We must always remember to love each other just as much as God loves us, which is unconditionally.

If faith is an important part of your daily life, it stands to reason that faith is an important part of any romantic relationships you'll have, too. Whether you're single, dating, or married, God has a plan for you and your future partner. Being able to lean on Christ throughout your relationship in times of stress, disagreement, or distance can be an important source of strength, no matter how long you've been with your partner. Reflecting on Bible verses about relationships can be as beneficial as studying Bible verses about grief during times of loss or Bible verses about anxiety during times of stress. Knowing where to find these verses about love and relationships (and not having to search for them) can give you an easy, go-to resource for strength and comfort even in the hardest times of your relationship. Remember: No relationship, not even a Godly one, is perfect. Being able to put all your trust, hope, and faith in Christ throughout your relationship may help you have a clearer vision of your future with your partner and as an individual. Here are 25 verses about relationships to comfort you throughout your Christ-centered relationship or marriage.

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