What are the 3 true loves?

The three loves that she came up with are the following: Lust, Passion, and Commitment. These three loves occur in different parts of the brain and occur independently from each other. For instance, you can be “in lust” with someone but have no perceived commitment to them (e.g., one night stands).

markmanson.net - The Three Loves Theory - Mark Manson

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Do you really know who the “One” is? Your true Soulmate?

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Love Three: Commitment

If two people remain in passion for long enough, and there is a long-term compatibility where they can continue to share new life experiences together indefinitely, then commitment will arise. Commitment is an unbelievably powerful feeling and occurs rarely in life. Commitment is when the passion of Love Two persists to the point that it’s unconditional. Couples that are in Love Two and not Love Three will often feel great until something happens: he loses his job, she has a miscarriage, he starts drinking, etc. Commitment is when you emotionally accept and love the other person’s flaws as much as their strengths. Scientists have actually shown that for couples who reach that level of commitment, their senses of self actually merge with the other person.6 What researchers have done is observe neural activation patterns in these long-term couples. They found that if you ask a man married for 20 years to think about his wife getting into a car accident, and then ask him to think about himself getting into a car accident, the same “self” spots in his brain will light up, whereas it won’t for anybody else. And it won’t for couples who have not been at the Third Love of commitment for a long period of time. Commitment arises with the idea that the relationship will persist indefinitely. The only way it can end is if one or both parties of a relationship change individually to the point where it becomes harmful for the other person to self-identify with their partner: again, think of the husband who becomes an alcoholic, or the wife who keeps cheating, etc. Sometimes even then, the power of commitment holds on, depending on the individuals. Passion and Lust can disappear well after Commitment arises without affecting the Commitment. In this way, each love is a pre-requisite for the subsequent love to emerge, but once it has, it’s no longer necessary. Lust is needed for passion, but passion can exist later without it. Passion must exist for commitment, but later on, commitment can exist without it. There are timetables for each love, although these are very arbitrary and will vary widely from person to person and couple to couple. But it’s helpful to think about this: Lust is instantaneous and comes and goes constantly, being very easy to retrieve once lost. Passion takes anywhere from a few days to a few weeks to emerge, and usually sticks around for 3-6 months. In highly compatible couples, it will persevere but still require effort and constant communication to maintain beyond a couple years. Commitment arises after anywhere from 1-3 years together and remains for a lifetime unless two people grow apart as individuals, in which case it often takes years to undo itself. (Cover image: “Couples on Kuta” by Nor Sasono is licensed under CC BY 2.0)

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What is the secret of true love?

Be authentic. To find real love, you must first emphasize your true self. If you want someone to love you through your moments of imperfection, you must first be willing to do that for someone else. Be real with yourself, so you are ready for someone else's authenticity.

psychologytoday.com - 5 Secrets to Finding Real Love | Psychology Today

The love of your life. Your soul mate. Your life partner. That special someone. Whether we admit it or not, many of us are seeking to find our perfect complement. We crave having someone by our side who will love us through our moments of imperfection and share the memories of our lives with us. We’ve seen enough movies about it, so it must be possible, right?

Love is no fairy tale, so you can stop looking for a perfect "10" who fulfills all the qualifications on your wish list. It is possible, however, to find someone to stand by your side, brave the messiness of the world, and help you experience life to its fullest potential. How do you set the foundation to attract this kind of love in your life? Here are five secrets to get you started:

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