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What age do boys need their dads?

6-14 years: The Dad Stage It's at this age that boys turn to their fathers as the primary parent. They watch and learn how a man behaves and responds in the adult world.

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6 is the magic age for dads

Steve Biddulph, renowned psychologist and author of the best selling book Raising Boys believes that boyhood can be divided into three distinct stages. He outlines that it is around the age of 6 when dads can really begin to make the most difference. In Raising Boys he sets out these three stages in a boy’s upbringing:

0-6 years: The Mum Stage

In the early years boys (as well as girls) need their mother more. Dads matter and they can be involved and help create a close bond of love and security but it is the mother who is more at the centre of a boy’s world.

6-14 years: The Dad Stage

It is at around the age of 6, that boys first discover, on a more intellectual level, that they are male. They look around for role models to learn what this entails. It’s at this age that boys turn to their fathers as the primary parent. They watch and learn how a man behaves and responds in the adult world. Mums are still important and provide the strong sense of love and security that every child needs, but a boy’s focus will, at this stage, be more on his father as he looks to him to show him the way. This stage is a precious opportunity for dads to make a difference and Biddulph’s advice to dads is not to squander it.

14-18 years: The Mentor Stage

By the age of 14 hormones have kicked in with the arrival of puberty. With a staggering 800% increase in testosterone, boys tend to face a time of volatility as they move from boyhood towards manhood. During this time they can feel more distant from their fathers. As they face the challenge of becoming a man, boys often need male role models and mentors other than their own parents, to help them find their way. Throughout these three stages the most important role dads play for their sons is to be a strong role model. Biddulph says:

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