Soulmate Gem
Photo: Tatiana Syrikova
Rest assured, it's perfectly okay to let your child play alone, even at a young age, as long as you're nearby and he's safe. So if your little one is looking at a book in his crib or sitting on the floor stacking cups (within ear- and eyeshot, of course), leave him be.
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Read More »Is your babe-in-arms always in your arms? While carrying around an 8-month-old is sure to build your biceps, it doesn’t give your baby much of a chance to flex his own muscles (crawling, cruising, sitting) — nor does it give you a chance to meet your own needs. But most importantly, playing solo has big benefits for little kids — and it’s a stepping stone on the path to independence. Here’s what you need to know about independent play, whether your child is 8 months old or 3 years old.
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Read More »Skip the big wooden toy chest in favor of a basket or a low open shelf (make sure it’s securely anchored). Toy boxes can frustrate a baby or toddler whose playthings are buried in a big jumble — plus, they provide a platform for unsanctioned climbing (and stacking of junk). Once you've found the right receptacle, fill it with a small number of toys, board books and stuffed friends. It'll be fun (and revealing) to see which ones your little one turns to most often. Rotating the stash will keep him from getting bored — or overwhelmed by choice. …but then teach him how to play. Your child might be hesitant to play on his own because he can't quite get the hang of a particular toy or game. So give him a quick how-to to encourage his efforts. Roll his jingly ball so he can hear the noise, or show him how to lay down wood train tracks. Once you get the process going, step away so he can continue on his own, assuring him that you'll be close by if he needs you. Your child might be hesitant to play on his own because he can't quite get the hang of a particular toy or game. So give him a quick how-to to encourage his efforts. Roll his jingly ball so he can hear the noise, or show him how to lay down wood train tracks. Once you get the process going, step away so he can continue on his own, assuring him that you'll be close by if he needs you. Set limits. If your toddler is upset by your attempts to get him to play solo, let him know that you need five minutes alone, and set a kitchen timer that he can watch. Once the time is up, turn your attention back to him so he trusts that the system works. Eventually, he'll come to appreciate that you need time (ideally, beyond five minutes!) on your own. For a baby who is too young to understand the timing system, step out of his line of vision and do a few quick peekaboos around the corner. This way, he starts to learn that even when you go away, you'll be back soon. After time’s up, return to your little one’s side and play with him. Each time you leave, try to stay away a bit longer, even if he's not thrilled about it. If your toddler is upset by your attempts to get him to play solo, let him know that you need five minutes alone, and set a kitchen timer that he can watch. Once the time is up, turn your attention back to him so he trusts that the system works. Eventually, he'll come to appreciate that you need time (ideally, beyond five minutes!) on your own. For a baby who is too young to understand the timing system, step out of his line of vision and do a few quick peekaboos around the corner. This way, he starts to learn that even when you go away, you'll be back soon. After time’s up, return to your little one’s side and play with him. Each time you leave, try to stay away a bit longer, even if he's not thrilled about it. Make it a habit. Kids thrive on routine, so if you make independent play a part of your little one’s day, he’ll be more agreeable to it. Carve out a few minutes of solo play in the morning and afternoon, and your baby or toddler will soon know to expect his “me” time.
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Read More »Don't expect independent play to happen overnight. Your child is used to the safety and comfort of your presence — and your participation in everything — so he might not be receptive to playing on his own at first. Be patient with his progress and encourage his successes, and soon both of you will learn — and relearn — how nice a little "alone time" can be.
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