Soulmate Gem
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Is being less available more attractive?

“What the scarcity principle says is that people are more attracted to those options or opportunities that are rare, unique or dwindling in availability,” Dr. Cialdini said.

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Be confident and assertive, Dr. Nicholson advises, with responses like: “Well, I do have a couple of other projects that I’m working on. However, I could prioritize this for you if you want.” By being selectively interested, you’re not being so hard to get that you insult the person who is seeking a relationship with you, he said, but rather letting them know that you have options. “Plus, you’re prioritizing them because they’re valuable to you as well.” And if you are still nervous about appearing overzealous, give yourself time to recalibrate before answering an email or hopping on the phone. Better yet: Get physical. Taking a moment to go on a walk has been shown to lower stress and boost your well-being. This allows your brain to quiet a little, said Liz Ryan, founder of Human Workplace and the author of “Reinvention Roadmap: Break the Rules to Get the Job You Want and Career You Deserve.” The point here is to decrease your anxiety so you can focus on the negotiation at hand.

Don’t jump the gun

It’s easy to become excited when an unexpected opportunity presents itself, Ms. Ryan said, but remember that your power in any negotiation is related to your ability to walk away. Once you have interest, channel that into due diligence, Mr. Lees said. “Research the organization as if you were going to invest half your life savings in it,” he said. It’s also important to continually check in with your gut, Ms. Ryan added, and remember: Don’t accept an offer before fully considering the terms. Playing hard to get can feel scary because you may really need the money, “but no one will value you more highly than you value yourself,” she said. Sometimes it’s a matter of giving yourself the space to calm down and evaluate.

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How do you tell if someone likes you subtly?

With that out of the way, let's get into this. He leans toward you during conversation. ... He angles his body toward you in the room. ... He finds small ways to compliment you. ... He makes eye contact. ... He steals a glance at you. ... He singles you out in a group. ... He seems drawn to you in the room. More items... •

Here's the thing about trying to know if a guy likes you: Sometimes looking for small signs is never going to give you an accurate full picture of what's going on. Some guys will do all of the above with their friends, while other guys will like someone but not do any of the above. "Some folks may be less able to express their attractions as overtly as this," Battle says. "For instance, my shy clients sometimes struggle with externalizing their feelings for a crush even in subtle ways. That means that even though they like someone, it might be harder for the other person to tell. When in doubt, talk about it!" If you're not sure if a guy likes you but is hiding it, just ask him and let him tell you directly how he feels. It sounds scary, but it definitely doesn't have to be! A simple "Hey, I think you're really cool, and I'm kind of into you—are you into me?" is casual, direct, a little sexy, and also nonthreatening. If it's a no, at least you know! And if it's a yes, now the fun stuff begins.

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