Soulmate Gem
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How many cards do you need for a Tarot reading?

It's 10 cards, so it's a lot of information and it's a very clear spread. Personally, I use a modified version of the Celtic Cross where I use the format, but I like to be loose with the positions because I want the cards to be whatever they want to be.

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Still, trying to enter into the vast world of tarot readings, of which there are centuries of literature about, is daunting. “There’s a lot of rules about tarot, which I think have been used in the past to have it be this secret esoteric thing and to keep people away, which was necessary as a protective measure. I don’t think that’s as necessary now. I think anyone can read tarot,” Howe says of the practice’s sometimes-exclusive practices and rules. “I’ve heard people say you’re not supposed to buy your own deck, you’re supposed to have someone gift it to you. My feeling is, I bought my deck and I can read. What if no one buys you a deck? Then you never get to learn how to read! Anything that feels like it’s a sort of boundary between people who know and people who don’t know, I don’t think applies anymore.” So in the spirit of inclusivity, I asked Howe to share some of her tips for new members of the tarot club. Those who still want to find out more—and happen to live in the New York area—can attend one of Howe’s workshops in Williamsburg.

Get to Know the Cards

After you’ve purchased a deck, the first thing to do is to familiarize yourself with the cards. “I think establishing a relationship with the cards is important. It can be so intimidating because it’s a deck of 78 cards and they’re all different. It’s a lot of information that I think a lot of people feel they have to memorize,” Howe admits. Her tip? “If you are starting out, just working by yourself, a lot of people do a daily card pull where they pull one card from the deck and just think about the meaning of the card. If you do it in the morning, you can keep it in mind as you go through your day. That’s a nice way to get to know the cards on a deeper level.” “Tarot is really like a tool, a tool to facilitate talking about things. Because there’s this sort of added mystical energy to it or some sort of mystical connection, you can see people start to open up in a way that they might not if you were just having a conversation about something. There’s something about the special energy about it that kind of melts away the walls that people have and then the conversation can really get in there and make changes,” Howe says. As such, it’s important for tarot readers to be ready to communicate. That means both keeping an open mind and trusting one’s own intuition. “Intuiting is definitely a big part of a tarot reading; that’s what makes it so special. That’s where energy comes in, being able to sense what someone is feeling, thinking, or going through.”

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What is the best age to be in a serious relationship?

It's important to consider your child as an individual. Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility. For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature 15-year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature 16-year-old wait a year or two.

When your child mentions dating, or a girlfriend or boyfriend, try to get an idea of what those concepts mean to them. Take note of how your child reacts when you discuss dating. It could be a little uncomfortable or embarrassing, but if your child is unable to even discuss it with you without getting defensive or upset, take that as a sign that they probably aren’t ready.

Other things to consider include the following.

Is your child really interested in someone in particular, or are they just trying to keep up with what friends are doing?

Do you think your son or daughter would tell you if something went wrong?

Is your child generally confident and happy?

Does your child’s physical development match their emotional development?

Be aware that for many tweens and young teenagers, dating amounts to socializing in a group. While there may be interest between two in particular, it’s not double-dating so much as a group heading out or meeting up at the movies or the mall. This kind of group stuff is a safe and healthy way to interact with members of the opposite sex without the awkwardness that a one-on-one scenario can bring. Think of it as dating with training wheels. So, when is a child ready for one-on-one dating? There’s no right answer. It’s important to consider your child as an individual. Consider their emotional maturity and sense of responsibility. For many kids, 16 seems to be an appropriate age, but it may be entirely suitable for a mature 15-year-old to go on a date, or to make your immature 16-year-old wait a year or two.

You can also consider what other parents are doing. Are lots of kids the same as yours already dating in the true sense of the word?

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