Soulmate Gem
Soulmate Gem
Photo: Tima Miroshnichenko
First, we tend to be drawn to people who are similar to us. We're commonly attracted to those who remind us of loved ones, such as parents, former significant others, or friends. “Subconsciously, hormones are activated because the other person has triggered some kind of similarity or resemblance,” says Beverly B.
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Read More »Even though many of us don’t want to admit it, good looks are the strongest factor influencing attraction. That’s according to Madeleine A. Fugère, Ph.D., a psychology professor at Eastern Connecticut State University and author of The Social Psychology of Attraction and Romantic Relationships. “When we consciously state our preferences for an ideal long-term partner, most of us say that traits, such as kindness, mutual affection, and intelligence, are more important than physical attractiveness,” she tells mbg. (According to research, altruism, in particular, is a compelling trait, particularly for women.) But in actuality, “physical attractiveness has a stronger impact on our dating decisions than factors such as personality or education.” This emphasis makes sense. After all, humans link “attractive” physical features with health, youth, and fertility. For men and women, symmetrical faces are appealing. Research has also shown straight men prefer women with a waist-to-hip ratio of about 70%. Why? “People who vary from that basic percentage are more likely to have pregnancy loss and are more susceptible to certain diseases and fertility challenges,” says Fisher. Similarly, straight men in one study responded to a specific spinal curvature in women, one linked with the ability to successfully birth children. Importantly, many of the studies available on this subject are based on relatively small groups of primarily white people, meaning the findings may very well not be representative of people of other races or of the general population. This is an issue in many areas of scientific research, but it's particularly important to point out in the case of attraction, much of which may be heavily influenced by factors such as race, socioeconomic status, or other aspects of identity. These factors play a large role in our cultural understanding of beauty, and so studies that don't take them into account may not fully capture the truth about attraction. Indeed, cultural body ideals play a sizable role in what people find attractive. For instance, the glorification of thin frames is a relatively recent, Western phenomenon. From the “Venus of Willendorf” figurines from tens of thousands of years ago to the voluptuous women portrayed in paintings by Rubens and Rembrandt, bigger and rounder figures have historically been idealized. In fact, “The scarcity of food throughout most of history had led to connotations that being fat was good, and that corpulence and increased ‘flesh’ were desirable as reflected in the arts, literature, and medical opinion of the times,” according to an analysis by Garabed Eknoyan, M.D., a nephrologist at the Baylor College of Medicine. “Only in the latter half of the nineteenth century did being fat begin to be stigmatized for aesthetic reasons,” he writes. To that end, we also tend to be influenced by the opinions of our friends, family, and society as a whole. When media narratives frequently show us images of thinner, light-skinned women as the beauty ideal, for example, we internalize them until they become a subconscious preference. Validating this, according to one study3 of white college students, men preferred women with lower BMIs than are actually healthy. “Cultural and family norms can have a big impact on the types of people we might choose to pursue or not pursue as potential romantic partners,” Fugère says. All that said, sometimes looks aren’t everything. Palmer adds that “there is some interesting research showing that finding out that a potential partner has a good personality can broaden our acceptance of different body types.”
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Read More »In a HerCampus.com survey of over 100 college women across the country, a majority ranked arms as the biggest turn on. Women feel it's a sign that you take good care of your body and admitted they love to see a hint of a man's biceps through his t-shirt or sweater.
Let’s cut right to the chase: It doesn’t matter if you look like a Greek god if you’re an asshole. While douchey men might be a woman’s go-to for a one-night stand, they’re not what women want in a lifelong partner (hey, researchers proved it), so this is in no way encouraging you to stop working on developing that sparkling personality and to just be a decent human being. Now that that’s out of the way, there are some aspects of a man’s physique that catch a woman’s attention. After all, it doesn’t hurt to have an Adonis-like physique to go along with good listening skills, an inquisitive nature, and attention to detail. Think of yourself as a dinner plate—you might taste good (i.e. be polite and have a good personality) but if you look like crap very few diners are going to want to stick their fork into you. You eat with your eyes first. Here’s a roundup—in no particular order—of the features women love on a guy; and not even just the body parts, but what specifically about men appeal to women. Some of these are obvious, while others might catch you off guard. Either way, all of these have been proven by science to be irresistible to women so get your notebook out now. You can sculpt some in the gym, but others have already been fated by genetics (sorry). Either way, this will give you some insight on what females prefer. Hint: You’ll quickly find that women are not much different than men.
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