How do you know if you are being taken for granted?

Being taken for granted can also be part of their attitude towards you. They may rarely make the effort to be kind, physically affectionate or say something nice to you. It can also show up in how you spend they spend their time - failing to make time for you or always putting time with family or friends ahead of you.

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How to stop being taken for granted

Whatever the case, the best way to begin to address the issue is by dealing with it head on - and talking about it. Although this can feel awkward, uncomfortable, or provoke negative emotions, it’s an essential first step if you want to begin to find your way back to how things used to be. It might be that making a few small but important changes is enough to begin to get things back on track. Sometimes, just putting aside a few hours a week to simply reconnect and see how each other is doing can make a real difference. That might mean going on the odd date night, or just having a fun day out together. Taking the time to do this sort of things can allow you to enjoy each other in the way you may have at the start of the relationship - and begin remember what it is you like about each other. Alternatively, it might be that you need to go a little deeper - confronting any issues that might be elsewhere in the relationship, and being honest about your feelings about these. It’s important that you don’t go into this kind of discussion with the intention of attacking your partner or telling them everything you think they’ve been doing wrong. Rather: it’s about addressing problems for the good of both of you, and the relationship as a whole. As part of this, it’s also important to consider things from the opposite perspective. It might be a challenging question to ask, but: are there any ways in which you might also taking them for granted? Are you making certain assumptions about them or about the relationship without checking in first? It’s rare that problems in a relationship are entirely down to one person - even if it feels like this. Being able to acknowledge any areas you might be able to work on will also help your partner feel less defensive.

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