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How do you know if someone isn't that into you?

insider.com - How to Tell If Someone Isn't Interested in You - Insider

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The INSIDER Summary:

It can be difficult to tell if someone is interested in you if they're playing games. INSIDER asked an expert for some signs that someone is just not that into you. If someone leaves you hanging, acts disinterested when you're around them, bails on you, and doesn't show affection, it's probably time to pack it up. In a perfect world, everyone would make their romantic intentions clear from the get-go. But if you've ever dated someone casually, you know that it can involve a lot of mind-games. It can be exhausting, running around in circles trying to find out if the person you're into actually likes you or is just stringing you along. INSIDER asked Venessa Marie Perry, PhD, MPH, founder, and chief relationship strategist of LoveWrite, a platform dedicated to changing the way we see, seek, and experience love, for some tell-tale signs that the person you're interested in probably doesn't share the same feelings.

They leave you hanging.

If you find yourself waiting around for hours — or days — for a text back from this person, it's a big sign that they're just not interested. "Everyone is busy, but we make time for what’s important. Not responding timely or at all is usually a sign of disinterest," Perry said. Of course you can't blame someone if they go MIA if they're going through something, but if getting them to talk to you feels like constantly pulling teeth, it's probably not worth it.

They seem to have other things on their mind.

You shouldn't be competing with a phone, the football game or their friends for your date's attention. If even one-on-one they seem to be more interested in external factors, it's a clear sign that they just aren't that into you. "If a person is on their phone or not interested in the conversation, they are looking for a way to get out of the situation and to do something else," Perry said.

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Try to organize a date with few distractions as a test, since they may not even realize they're doing it. But if you still feel like you want to wave a hand in front of their face in order to notice you, they're not feeling it. Someone who cares about you will not repeatedly bail on you. Unsplash/Courtney Clayton

They're not sexual or physically affectionate with you.

Physical touch is a big part of most relationships, but if you're not even getting a physical attraction from them, it may be time to pack up shop on this relationship, Perry told INSIDER. Of course, some people will only be interested in a physical relationship and for others, sex just isn't important. So how often you're getting it on isn't a perfect indicator of their interest. But a differing interest in physicality is worth talking about and seeing what you both want out of a relationship, if anything.

They keep bailing on you.

"Things come up on occasion, but if it becomes a regular pattern that's a problem," Perry said. "In addition, if they cancel at the last minute on a regular basis, they probably have a better offer." The bottom line is that people will make time for the things that they care about. If someone is serious about wanting to be with you, they won't allow you to slip through the cracks. The sad truth is if you have to question if they care, there's a good chance that they don't. The less time you waste on someone who leaves you hanging, the more time you'll have to spend with someone who never would.

insider.com - How to Tell If Someone Isn't Interested in You - Insider

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