Soulmate Gem
Photo: Vera Arsic
Since narcissists generally lack empathy for other people, it may be very hard for them to genuinely love another person.
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Read More »Can a narcissist love? Can they fall in love permanently, or does their personality preclude the possibility of them ever being in a healthy long-term relationship? These are interesting questions, and the answer may be a bit complicated and vary depending on who you ask. If you have come to terms with the fact that you're dating someone with narcissistic tendencies, then you'll want to pay attention to the answers. Since narcissists generally lack empathy for other people, it may be very hard for them to genuinely love another person. This might be a difficult concept to accept, especially if you find yourself seeking a narcissist’s love or trying to make an existing relationship with a narcissist work. However, one must recognize that narcissism exists on a spectrum, and some individuals with narcissistic traits may be more capable of giving and receiving love. The trick is knowing who they might be, which can be a challenge in itself. Learning as much as you can about narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) can prepare you for interacting with those individuals who have it. While the narcissist may work on or try to change their behavior, at the end of the day, you are ultimately most responsible for yourself. You are not responsible for their thoughts, feelings, or actions toward you. Knowing about the disorder and equipping yourself with tools for engaging with a narcissist is the best thing you can do, especially if you’re wondering whether they are truly capable of showing and receiving love. It is good to develop knowledge of the disorder and prepare yourself for a relationship with this person. Are You Overcoming A Toxic Relationship With A Narcissist? Lean Into The Support Of A Therapist
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Read More »Since narcissists have either a partial or a total disregard for the feelings of others, being in a relationship with one can be distinctly challenging. This is because the narcissist can become upset if they perceive anything that they believe to be a slight against them, or they might be unwilling to admit when they do something wrong. This means that narcissists often have trouble sustaining healthy relationships. If you think you’re dating or know a narcissist, you’ll want to be prepared for the experience so that there are fewer surprises. Indeed, narcissists can be predictable if you know what to expect and how they normally behave. You may have just started dating someone and, through this person’s words and actions, have come to the conclusion that they have this disorder. They may or may not have ever been diagnosed, but because of the negative aspects of their personality, you still feel certain this person is a narcissist. While it’s up to you to decide whether you’d like to continue dating this person, there are some realities you might want to be prepared for. For one, know that the narcissist might frequently put their own needs before yours. Healthy relationships are built on compromise and a solid give-take dynamic. However, most narcissists prioritize power and prefer dominance in a relationship, so you may find that the person you’re dating is only interested in taking and does not consider your wants and needs. This can be disheartening, especially if you feel you do a lot for them. A narcissist can also have impaired emotional empathy, which makes it difficult for them to express care for others. Impaired emotional empathy desensitizes the individual and makes it harder to establish an emotional connection with them. Most people are able to relate to, comfort, and empathize with their fellow human beings. This is even more true when they’re in a relationship or in love with someone else. However, since a narcissist is often unable to develop positive feelings towards others the way some people are, that piece may be missing in a romantic partnership. Whether you consider it worth it to date someone with these characteristics is going to be a personal decision. On the surface, it would be easy to say no and move on to the next possibility. However, we cannot always help whom we fall in love with or for whom we develop feelings. Of course, a person might have narcissistic tendencies and still have many other good qualities. They may have achieved a lot in their chosen career, or they could be very attractive individuals. Maybe they're a sharp dresser and well groomed. They may be both intelligent and articulate. You may have to weigh all of that against the chances that at some point they may demand something unreasonable from you or say something that's going to put you down and make you feel bad about yourself. Again, the choice is yours. You must do what is best and healthiest for you. Since narcissism is a spectrum, it’s possible that some issues can be resolved with the help of a professional. Other times, there are too many obstacles standing in the way of a flourishing partnership. Rather than focusing on whether someone is a narcissist, try to determine whether the relationship is healthy. Here are some signs that you are in an unhealthy or otherwise toxic partnership:
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Read More »There is no cure for narcissistic personality disorder at present. It's a disorder that may be central to whoever has it, and it's not something that can ever be completely discarded. It often takes a combination of a tremendously determined partner and a narcissist who is open to modifying their behavior to effect a marked change in their actions. Many people make the mistake of believing they can change the narcissist. If they love them more, make changes to themselves, or work harder at meeting the narcissist’s needs, somehow things will be different. This is often not the case. It is unlikely that someone with narcissism will own up to their behavior, and they may not be willing to change. Why? It’s possible that they believe they’re perfect as they are. If you choose to stay with them, you may have to accept this potentially difficult mindset. Even if you had a partner who was willing to admit to their narcissism on the surface, they may only be doing so to humor you. You might ask them to change their behavior, and they might give it lip service, saying that they would do so because they love you and are willing to make an effort on your behalf. It may be unlikely, though, that the change will occur, or will last for very long. Narcissists tend to resist changes they don’t want to make. Although your narcissistic partner may not often exhibit empathy, you might empathize with others easily. This doesn’t mean you should stay in a relationship with them or give them the benefit of the doubt, but it does mean you can remain compassionate about their disorder and give them the respect every human being deserves. In many cases, you’ll need to practice this compassion and empathy from a distance for your own wellbeing. Rather than holding onto anger and resentment, recognize that the individual has a mental health disorder that they cannot help. Knowing this can greatly aid you in healing and moving forward.
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