Do kinks come from parents?

We have no concrete evidence that our genetic makeup is directly linked to our sexual interests. At least not yet. But it's fair to say that some people are genetically predisposed to develop kinks and fetishes. It is relatively well documented that personality is to some extent heritable.

canadatoday.news - Are Kinks hereditary? What science says about the genetics of desire

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Are wrinkles hereditary or learned? The short answer is both.

The genetics of sexual attraction and desire is a deeply underfunded area of research. Still, there’s growing evidence that our genes may play a much larger role in the development of our erotic selves than previously thought.

What is a kink? Kink vs Fetish?

according to dr Justin Lehmiller, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute and a research advisor to Lovehoney, is a kink of any kind of non-mainstream sexual interest. A fetish is a specific subtype of kink defined by an increased fascination with a specific object, body part, or bodily fluid. In other words, fetishes tend to have a sensory component, where people are drawn to the feel, taste, smell, or look of a particular thing. “All fetishes are kinks, but not all kinks are fetishes,” explains Lehmiller. Author and “gonzo anthropologist” Katherine Gates has dedicated her career to the study of sexual subcultures. From a non-academic perspective, Gates offers another way of understanding the difference between kink and fetish: kink describes the use of props and roleplay in erotic interactions, but these elements are not required to get off. Also, kinky encounters don’t necessarily involve sex – the experience can be satisfying with or without it. Fetish, on the other hand, means a sexual interest that is “extremely tight and fixed.” And that fetish has to be built in so that the person can get off and feel sexually fulfilled from an encounter. dr Gloria Brame is a sexologist, sex therapist, and self-proclaimed fetishist best known for her work around BDSM. “For me, the fetish is about really feeling comforted,” Brame said. “This is how I feel when a fetish manifests itself.”

OK, but are wrinkles hereditary?

We have no concrete evidence that our genetic makeup is directly linked to our sexual interests. At least not yet. But it’s fair to say that some people are genetically predisposed to develop kinks and fetishes. It is relatively well documented that personality is to some extent heritable. Certain traits tend to run in families. And as Lehmiller can testify after interviewing thousands of people on the subject, our sexual fantasies can be read, at least in part, as a reflection of our personalities. Extraverts, for example, were particularly attracted to group sex and non-monogamous fantasies. The fantasies of highly conscientious individuals tended to be more detailed, with a particular emphasis on sex in unique settings like the beach. Lehmiller also found a pattern of interest in kink and BDSM in people with a penchant for sensation-seeking: another personality trait that has been shown to have a genetic basis. Often, high-sensation-seekers need a stronger stimulus to experience arousal or achieve orgasm. “Because people who are looking for high sensations, what they see in some of the research involved is that their dopamine receptors aren’t quite as sensitive as other people,” Lehmiller explained. “So they just need that higher level or threshold of arousal to get the same sexual thrills as other people.”

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However, it is important to remember that our erotic interests are the product of many factors. On the biological side, these factors can include our genetic makeup, unique brain chemistry, and the way our bodies are designed. “Some people have extraordinarily sensitive nipples,” Lehmiller continued. “For others, there is simply no sensation. And when your body has this heightened level of sensitivity, you might be very attracted to various forms of nipple play, including more intense BDSM versions of it with nipple clamps and whatnot. So I think part of it is this general sensitivity in different parts of our body. That could also have a genetic component.” Psychological factors such as our personality, previous learning experiences and general attitudes towards sex are another piece of the puzzle. And there are also environmental factors to consider – the cultural context, which in part determines our choice of partners and the opportunities available to us. “Whenever we talk about sexual interests, we have to talk about it from a biopsychosocial perspective,” Lehmiller urged. “Two people can develop the same sexual interest for very different reasons, depending on the confluence of all these factors.”

How do kinks and fetishes arise?

Many people can identify a specific childhood experience as the source of their kink or fetish. For some, it feels like a fact of life from birth. Others find their kinks later in life through solo or partner exploration. In Brame’s experience, thanks to the internet, younger generations are becoming aware of their weaknesses earlier in life. But in some cases, the culture of silence and shame surrounding sexual kinks can delay the discovery process by decades. “You don’t necessarily realize who you are until you’re in your teens or maybe even your twenties,” Brame noted. “Or maybe even in their fifties, not because it’s totally out of the blue. But you don’t realize what kink is or what it means to be a pervert. Or that some of your private sexual fantasies actually coincide with Kink. Oftentimes, the emotional and sexual resonance of the kink is enhanced by masturbation. “We know that the connection between the brain’s olfactory centers and the brain’s memory centers and the brain’s emotional centers is very tight,” Gates added. “And stuff like that that we would consider classic kinks, like a foot fetish. Or rubber or leather or things that sensory evoke, especially through smell, can connect with emotional content and memories to form a kind of circuit where you smell it and you have this stimulus in that memory that is very emotional. You can amplify this through masturbation, for example, to the point where it becomes a very fixed pathway in your brain. But Gates believes that some people are “prepared” to develop a kink or fetish under the right conditions.

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“I interviewed this wonderful guy who considers himself a macrophile,” Gates said. “He loved to fantasize about giant women. And he said, ‘Nature loads the gun and education pulls the trigger.’ I like this metaphor because it sort of explains how this works — that you can be biologically and neurologically primed to be primed.”

Is kink a sexual orientation?

Brame firmly believes that kink isn’t a hobby — it’s a legitimate sexual identity. Throughout her life, relationships that did not align with her preferences inevitably failed. The kink was never explicitly discussed or cited as a reason for the split — that discovery would come later. But in hindsight, it makes sense that certain power dynamics didn’t hold up for them. “Actually, I led a really mainstream life. But I couldn’t make vanilla relationships work,” Brame recalled. “They came and they went and they came and they went… When I found out I was into BDSM I was really excited. I never looked back I only had naughty partners and that led to a marriage of 32 years.” According to Lehmiller, the data supports both possibilities. For some it is a leisure activity. For others, an interest in kink can have “very deep roots.” “It’s very stubborn, it’s persistent, it has some of the other characteristics that a sexual orientation has,” Lehmiller said. “It’s not malleable. I think for some people there seems to be a sense that kink is more of a sexual orientation for them. But again, I don’t know if we understand exactly why that is.”