Soulmate Gem
Soulmate Gem
Photo: cottonbro studio
"In fact," my biggest fan continued, "I think you've got a post idea there: Why men like women who tease them." So I probed, and it turns out the attraction is threefold. "Eighty-eight percent of the guys said that it melted their hearts when their wife expressed that he made her happy," says Feldhahn.
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Read More »The night I met my now boyfriend—to steal his terminology—I "busted his balls" within seconds, poking fun at his underwhelming opening line and pointing out the more obvious, surefire options he'd had in front of him. And on a recent evening, sitting across a candlelit table during a date he'd planned, we reminisced over what had caught each other's eyes that very night. "I loved that you gave me a hard time," he admitted. The fact that I wasn't focused on playing nice in order to nab his number made me more attractive, he revealed. "In fact," my biggest fan continued, "I think you've got a post idea there: Why men like women who tease them." So I probed, and it turns out the attraction is threefold. "Eighty-eight percent of the guys said that it melted their hearts when their wife expressed that he made her happy," says Feldhahn. How to do it: "A big smile when he walks in the door, a spontaneous hug when he says something sweet, or even saying 'You make me happy' tells him he's doing well at this relationship thing—and makes him want to do even better." Getty Images First, men bond with each other in this way, showing their bro-like love by ribbing on the other's fantasy football selections or faltering fashion sense. "When a woman rips on me in a playful way," another male friend told me, "it's like she's telling me she likes me by speaking my own language." Second, teasing shows off a personality trait men go gaga over: having a sense of humor. While your conversational repertoire may not include knock-knock jokes, any woman can still make a man laugh by giving him a hard time. Example: This weekend, as my boyfriend sucked on a Zicam, I couldn't help but gently mock how he sounded as he muttered with the dissolving tablet on his tongue—and he laughed so hard I worried he might choke on it. Third, my boyfriend says, teasing shows a sense confidence: Being sweet has its place, of course, but teasing tells a man you can play witty banter ball without worrying what he'll think of you. This insight comes with a caveat though: You can take teasing too far. "It isn't about being mean or hurtful," my boyfriend says, "because no one is going to like that." Or, as my friend explains, "At the end of the day, I need to still know you like me—not be questioning why you would after what you said." But by steering clear of sensitive subjects, you can surprise, delight, and make your dude laugh by going back to elementary school and giving him a hard time.
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Read More »To make your man happy emotionally, you have to be attentive to his needs and to know when to give him space. To make your man happy sexually, you have to want to try new things and to be bold and adventurous. But the most important part is that you are feeling happy while you're pleasing your man.
This article was co-authored by Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT . Alysha Jeney is a Licensed Relationship Therapist, the Owner of Modern Love Counseling, and the Co-Founder of The Modern Love Box. She specializes in relationship therapy, intimacy building, and existential exploration. Alysha holds a BA in Psychology from The Metropolitan State University of Denver and an MA in Marriage and Family Therapy/Counseling from Regis University. She has been featured in publications such as The Washington Post and The Huffington Post. This article has been viewed 945,973 times.
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