Soulmate Gem
Photo: Leeloo Thefirst
Absent children, however, there less need to stay together. Couples without children divorce more often than couples that have at least one child, according to researchers, despite numerous studies that marital happiness nosedives in the first year or two after the birth of a child and sometimes never quite recoups.
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Read More »Most observers believe that many marital failures have what is termed “masked breakdowns” where the couple keeps up a front “for the sake of the children.” Some 27 percent of divorces involve no children, but only 9 percent of marriages are childless. Childless marriages always appear more prone to breakdown, especially if failure results from of a lack of desire for children. This may reflect the temperament of childless couples and the unwillingness of a responsible couple to have children when they feel their marriage buckling. Absent children, however, there less need to stay together. Couples without children divorce more often than couples that have at least one child, according to researchers, despite numerous studies that marital happiness nosedives in the first year or two after the birth of a child and sometimes never quite recoups. The terms childless and childfree carry affective – and in some cases, political – connotations. Childless refers to people who have no children due to biological problems or genetics, “waiting too long to have a child, a failed relationship, an illness preventing conception, unsuccessful fertility treatments, not finding a suitable partner, or not having the means to raise a child.” People often cannot have the children they may once planned. Some childless individuals move forward with no children in their lives; others struggle along a path they had not anticipated. For the childless, infertility can be a source of great sorrow. Childfree refers to “people who decided not to bear children. Their lives do not include procreation. Childhood influences, life satisfaction without kids, the lack of desire, enjoyment of one’s freedom, environmental concerns, financial concerns” – all motivate some people to take a pass on parenthood. The fact remains, whatever the reason, being childfree is a good option for many. For the childfree, the absence of offspring is cause for joy. Years ago, sociologist Paul H. Jacobson documented that divorce is more frequent among marriages without children: “For couples without children, the divorce rate in 1948 was 15.3 per 1,000. Where one child was present, the estimate rate was 11.6 per 1,000. The figure thus continues to decrease, and in families with four or more children, it was 4.6. Altogether, the rate for couples with children was 8.8 per 1,000. In other words, the rate for childless couples was almost double the rate for families with children.” More recently, according to journalist Anneli Rufus, whose number crunching discovered that of the divorced couples in the United States, 66 percent are childless compared with 40 percent who have kids. Evidently, the “absence of children leads to loneliness and weariness.”
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Read More »On the other hand, others say that marriages without children may be more satisfying to the spouses. “I’ve been tracking the childfree for over 10 years now, and see many, many happily married childfree couples out there,” says Laura Carroll, who blogs at La Vie Childfree and is the author of Families of Two: Interviews with Happily Married Couples Without Children by Choice. Couples without kids have more time, energy and money to spend on their careers, friends, each other and themselves. According to recent surveys, one for No Kidding!, an international social group for people without children, and one by Laura S. Scott, author of Two is Enough: A Couple’s Guide to Living Childless by Choice, couples often decide not to have kids because they want to put their relationship first.
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